Thursday, October 10, 2013

A Piss-Me-Off Journal

Okay, I'm annoyed by so many things right now that I can't stop at just one thing.

1) My new mattress hasn't yet been delivered. We have to leave in an hour. They just texted me to tell me they're coming in about thirty minutes. I'm going to go crazy trying to get out of the house in time for Nick's karate lesson. It's hard enough getting out of the house without mattress guys downstairs wrestling with my old stinky guest bed mattress. God, that's going to be embarrassing even without the need to rush out of the house.

2) I don't have a dinner plan.

3) Nick has taken to yelling questions to me while I'm working in the kitchen. Aside from the sense it gives me of being a kitchen maid, I can't hear what he's saying much of the time because I'm running water or grinding something. My teeth, maybe? Both reasons are cause enough for me to ask him to come into the kitchen to ask his question. He was annoyed to have to get up. Okay, kid, pick your butt up off the floor and use those muscles to walk into the kitchen! Now! I didn't say that, but he got the idea. Then, he got offended when I copied the expression on his face, the surly expression. It was a good day for a new vocabulary word. How do you define 'surly?'

4) The website for the school photos is no longer available. I had a photo taken on picture retake day, Monday, and thought I'd order copies for my family. I had checked the website on Monday night, but it didn't display my picture. Was that another kid with my same name or was it a model? I wasn't sure. Today, when I tried again, it wouldn't let me in and I had a hell of a time getting a phone number so I could ask. The lady who finally answered the phone said that those photos aren't available forty-eight hours after the shot was taken. Really? She said she could take my order over the phone, but then, she got mad when I told her that I wanted to respect the rules the company had set up for the website. If they don't want to sell photos that they've bothered to take just three days after the shot was taken, then I can respect that. Vote with your wallet, people!

5) My cream of broccoli soup turned pale green. Who the hell wants to eat green soup?

6) The government is still shut down. Does Congress still get paid for those days?

7) The new HP printer we bought last spring was still under warranty when it failed. The company happily sent us a new printer, a refurbished printer. The 90 day warranty for the refurbished printer ends well before the year is up on our original HP printer. How is that fair? Now, the refurbished printer has to have its head cleaned every day when I need to print something. I want to get it fixed, but it's not under warranty even though it's been less than a year since we bought the damn thing! Never going to buy an HP printer again in my lifetime. Voting with my wallet again!

You know, years ago, Oprah had a segment on having a gratitude journal. She said it made her happier and guaranteed that it would make me happier too.  I don't know. I never tried it. Sorry, Oprah. Maybe I'm missing out on a great deal of happiness that I could have had over all these years, not to mention the physical remembrance left behind for Nick who would get a bookcase full of the lists of things I loved about him. Bummer. At this point, he'd probably give me an eye-roll over half that shit anyway. I've become an embarrassment. I get it. I did it that with my mother too.

What Oprah didn't tell me was just how satisfying it would be to rant the hell out of stuff that pisses me off.

Hey Oprah honey! Have you tried this new feel-good technique? It's called the 'piss me off' journal. Try it. It just might make a person happier. It might not, but I feel better now.

Thank you for listening, jules

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