Friday, March 24, 2017

Rolling the Stone Up the Hill

So much has been going on. The U.S. government is in turmoil. There's a race between the patriots who are trying to find out about the Trump administration's involvement with Russia and the administration's need to eliminate regulations that protect our society against racism and corporate greed. Who will win? Every day, more honorable Republicans are joining Democrats and questioning the illegal actions of the Trump administration, but will the truth come to light soon enough?

It's nail-biting to watch the news these days. What a fucking drama. (You should know that I follow that fake news, MSNBC, The New York Times, CNN, and the Washington Post.) Can't these politicians lie any more convincingly than they do? Spicer and Nunes both look like they have bones stuck sideways in their throats when they talk. And none of the sentences any of the pressured politicians use are clear. Sometimes what they say doesn't actually have a meaning. What a fucking dance to always have to avoid saying anything that is true. It's like watching the little kid with a stain on his pants and a yellow puddle at his feet who looks off to the side and says defiantly that he didn't pee himself. But we can see what's happening. Why keep lying?

I suppose it worked so far for Sessions. He's still in his position even though he recused himself. They still need to fire him. The whole Trump administration is a quagmire of conspiracy and only a vague attempt at concealment.

Here at home, it's a mess too. Oh, I shouldn't make you think we're in a true turmoil like the one in D.C. Everyone is healthy, thank God. No one is leaving home and we're not screaming at each other, except once in a while when Nick is being intentionally obtuse and stubborn. Last night, he forgot to bring in groceries from the car he was driving. Today, he's eating the stuff that sat out all night. I hope he doesn't get sick. The temperature outside was in the mid-forties this morning, so he should be okay. I'm not entirely certain of that though.

Still, my mind is in turmoil this morning.

Nick has begun to prepare for the ACT and the SAT. He took a mock ACT and last night we got the results. He's horrible at taking tests. I'm sure he's a bright kid, but he hides most of his intelligence. He does well in math and science, but the boy refuses to read on his own, so it affects anything that requires much reading and writing, which is practically everything!

It's time someone else told him to turn off the damned TV. It's time someone else told him to read a damned book. So, I just finished writing a note to his Language Arts teacher.

I asked her to nag him. I did. Truly. I used the word 'nag.'

Nick is sixteen. There isn't very much that he will hear that comes out of my mouth. Oh, sometimes he listens, but that only happens when something shitty comes out of my mouth. Then, he's wide awake to my words. Gossip? Self-righteousness? Hypocrisy? Cursing? Oh, he's avid to hear stuff like that. But when I try to tell him how to prepare for life, he's in a soundproof room and I am in space where no one can hear me scream.

I just finished reading an amazing book, An Astronaut's Guide to Life on Earth, by Col. Chris Hadfield. If I thought Nick would crack the spine, I'd buy him a copy. I'm tempted to buy copies for five of his best friends and hope some of the ideas will bleed back into Nick's sphere of awareness. I'm tempted to buy a copy for one of his teachers to give to him.

Col. Hadfield writes about attitude, preparation, and about making sure you choose a life you think is fun. He writes about achieving your goals and about how to manage when you don't. This guy started thinking about how to prepare to be an astronaut when he was nine! I'll bet he began saving for his retirement at about that age too. And as the book proceeds, Hadfield describes some of the most exhilarating experiences a person can have. Doing somersaults in zero gravity. Throwing a live snake out of an airplane window at 200 mph. Looking at the jewel of the earth from orbit. He's so enthusiastic, it's infectious.

In the meantime, I've given up trying to get Nick to read, even an amazing book like this.

So, I'm begging teachers to take over the job of pushing his stone up the hill.

I am Sisyphus.

As if teachers don't already have enough stones to roll uphill.

 Thank you for listening, jules

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